At Panera across the street from the physical therapist. Leaving at 11:00 for the Hansmeyer family Christmas, unless we see a report of the weather being bad–rainy, sleety, snowy–tonight.
Last night, Dorothea and I had a nice time–childlessly–going to a movie at the Science Museum, out to eat and a beer at Great Waters brew pub, and a nice walk. We had some of Thomas’s herb. First time in a very long time for either of us. Oh, and after the walk, we watched the Chinese movie “Smile.”
The movie that we saw at the Science Museum was Mars 3-D. I have been interested for sometime in going back to a 3-D movie to see what it’s like. Because of my strabismus. I had always figured that 3-D would either be invisible or no. But I have learned that I have some limited 3-D vision. I don’t get the subtile stuff; I didn’t get the immediate “wow” effect apparently experienced by the nine-year old boy in front of me, but I do thinks that are overtly coming off the screen. So this is a comforting thing.
Smile is about a workingman in China who discovers an abandoned newborn and keeps and raises her. She was abandoned at birth because she had a cleft palate. His insistance on keeping her leads to his wife and son leaving him. Then doctor volunteers come and do surgery, but no until she’s seventeen.
Madeline came home from seeing the new Harry Potter movie when we were about half way through Smile. I thought that was good. There is a parallel plot in which a Valley-Girl type learns for the Chinese girl and goes on a mission to help her. There was talk of sex, not having sex, birth controal, being self-centered, thinking of othes. It was good.
Thinking about my boss, and how he (unfortunately) reminds me of my father, and how my feeling with my boss/father is that I generally can’t do anything right by him(/them), I realized that I hope that my children don’t end up thinking of me in that way. But maybe they do or will. Which leads to the understanding that such an outcome is just what I imagine, that it fits with my general outlook on life, which is dominated with feelings of remorse and regret.
News of Pauline and her lung cancer is another time to evaluate all this. Life–short. Why be bothered by such trivial, negative emotions? Thomas–gone. It is like a parallel universe, an emptiness. Was he really here? Walking the dog along urban-residential sidewalks, just as I have always done, all my life. Listening to 89.3 radio station, some group doing a rap-influenced redo of some Doors song, realizing that the original is easily 35 years old, but that, in 1970, a 35-year old song would have been from 1935. In 1970, pop groups were not commonly re-making songs from 1935.
Dorothea called Jack and Pauline. They were as concerned about how she’s doing as she was about them. According to Dorothea, Pauline is taking a very Christian, “this is not my home” sort of approach. I judy flashed on all the lyrics of Sacred Harp songs, the theme, of dying and going on.